Social Networking (JOATMON)

Facebook pulls you up as a "Friend I May Know"
May know?! Quite a bit, I'd say so
All up in my news feed
It's like I got a Ustream
Maybe a tributary
Because I'm cut off--My river ran into the cemetery
It's selfish, but it hurts more to see your happy updates
Flipping through our old tagged photos keeps me up late

This wouldn't be if I could have had everything my way
Since it ended I can't even look at MySpace
You still my Top Friend, I can't change it
It hurts too much rearrange it

I start to sweat at the sight of ya @mentions
Twitter got me bitter, but I act like I pay it no @tention
But you have been pounded in my mind
#You the trending topic
It seems to follow @you and I cant stop it

I see you log on and I feel even more miserable
Because I need you, but to you my status is invisible
I try to stay in your life by sending an occasional message
It hurts trying to fit in your life, that's why hearts aren't a shape in tetris
But pathetically i still log on
Because my home page is you.com

@TRPhipps

FOLLOW AND FEEL

It Was Just My Imagination Pt. 2

Our love was like a fantasy.
We always felt like each other was a mirage,
Until we reached the oasis of us
The dream paled in comparison to the sun kissed tan of our reality.
Paradise…

I trusted you. I believed you. I loved you
I could find no flaw…
I wanted you to be my everything…
I would do anything…
I wanted you to want for nothing

You trusted me. You believed me. You loved me
Your cries of how much you love me soared to the heavens
Hell, you wanted to be my everything…
You would do anything…
You wanted me to want for nothing
But…where are you now?

Where are those reassuring hugs?
Where are those comforting kisses?
Where are those rainy days of holding?
Where are those laughter loaded hours?

Did they ever really happen?
Or was it…just my imagination?

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It Was Just My Imagination Pt. 1 (JOATMON)

On a snowy Kansas night
With a star studded sky tucked in to the clouds
I saw you
As our eyes met, our minds meld
Our souls synced and our lives linked
Siren or not, my mind had no fear, no doubt
You beckoned me
And as if our feet were fused, in lock-step
We inched closer and closer
Those chestnut eyes grew more fiery
That smile grew more brilliant
That coke bottle frame grew more curvy

My consciousness was knocked unconscious
Though stranger, this feeling was so familiar
And as we stood nose to nose
There were no thoughts, no nervousness
We both knew what was next

And as we inched closer, lips perched, hearts throbbing
It was only a matter of time before we reached nirvana
It seemed like an eternity before I felt you
But I could have kissed you for infinity
But as I opened my eyes to get another look—No one was there
I scanned the area, high and low, yet to no avail
….it was just my imagination…

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My Favorite Memory of You...

As I was cleaning my room yesterday, I came across a picture of you
As I gazed into your red eyes, I remembered my favorite memory of you

You’re hair is askew
Your make up is running
You’re face is flush
You aren’t even looking at me
You were in this room, at that door
The yells drowning in the tears
I reached out to you…
You reached out to me…
And you left...

Left me…left Us…
That's why my favorite memory of you is the last one.
The last time “US” existed
The final time We were

My favorite memory of you is Our break up.
Because that’s only place We exist
…in the end.


JOATMON
TRPASTICHE
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Optical Coitus

As I was grooving in the club, I peered in to the crowd
As I scan the roomed--Our eyes met
Seemingly destined
Instantly consuming
Penetrating our perception

Time froze as our bodies rose
Into the sky, into each other
As our iris’ engaged in intercourse
Our hearts raced, our minds lagged
And our adrenaline rushed

Competing to see, who would let go first
We were transfixed on transmitting our inner tempest
I never felt so alive

I wanted her to feel, everything I ever felt for a woman
Our eyes made contact, but our bodies touched

As I walked closer and closer
The temperature soared higher and higher
Our hearts beat faster and faster
Our sweat poured and poured

And just as I reached her, her boyfriend shook her free
But as she walked away, she looked back for a quickie

JOATMON
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"Do You Want Her Back?!"

As I was talking to Ms. Right Now, trying to seem like Mr. Right
She started asking me about them.
You know, the ones that got away.
I gave the mature reason that, “It didn’t work out.”
Then she asked about Her.
You know, the One that got away.

The One that used to set my sun and illuminated my nights
The One that helped me, that held me, that had me
The One that made me, me
The One that built me
The One that destroyed me

And I admitted this all, but again opted for the mature conclusion
“It didn’t work out.”

And as if she already new, smugly she inquired
“Do you want Her back?”

That was then, the past has passed,
“Do you want Her back?”

I’m a different person now, we are totally different people
“Do you want Her back?”

I pled until my tongue bled, my tear ducts dried and my saliva evaporated for Her to return, She didn’t so it’s done.
“DO YOU WANT HER BACK?!”

Yes! I want my sun to shine and my stars to illuminate!
I need Her to help me, to hold me, to have me!
To make me, me again!
To build me!
To re-destroy me!

“Ryan, did you hear me? Can I call you back?”

The conversation was all in my head
She didn’t ask me--I asked me, “Do you want Her…”

JOATMON
@TRPHIPPS

La Luz De Mi Vida (The Light of My Life)

Like Christmas lights they cascade the sky,
Invade the eyes
The wonders, a parade of lights
I pray “LORD STAY THE NIGHT!”
Because a the top of the tree, my star shines,
Beams, radiates, illuminates, lights

My north star, creating an aurora borealis in my heart-
even when you are not here.
You are not here…
But you are in my thoughts, but I cannot see you
In my head, but I cannot hear you
In my heart, but I cannot feel you
In my dreams, but I can’t make memories with you

The memory with you
Feels like a century with you
Even though it was a minute with you
But is it eternal?

Estrella, the light of my night
Longing in my soul, para mi Sol, the light of my life

But the moon is fading
The sun’s invading
And you…you are gone…but not forgotten

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TRPastiche